G.M. Nair's Excuse For A Newsletter #1

 In which an introduction is made. 

Oh, my god. What have I done? Fuck. Fuck. Shit. Fuck. I have no idea how to write a newsletter! 90% of the things I do and say aren't important enough to tell my parents, let alone count as NEWS. Okay. Hold on. Grab ahold of yourself. Breathe. Just start writing. People just want content. It doesn't matter if the content is stream-of-consciousness drivel. People are dumb, stupid sheep. As long as you don't reveal your utter disdain for your audience, you should be fin- aw, shit.

I suppose you're wondering why I gathered you all together here today.

Oh, hello. You're receiving this newsletter because you've expressed interest in my fledgling independent novel series 'Duckett & Dyer: Dicks For Hire', you've been swayed to sign up by my overwhelming charm, or you're the victim of some terrible scam. Either way, welcome to my newsletter. Come for the content and stay for the typos. The unsubscribe button is located conveniently in the footer of this e-mail.

Events And Other Transpirings 

Despite my best attempts to convince them otherwise, the good folks at DartFrog books have graciously told me that I will be part of their inaugural panel of Independent Authors at the historic and prestigious Strand Bookstore in New York City. Since I live there, this is a super easy event for me to get to, so I couldn't refuse. I'm not looking forward to lugging a box of books downtown on the 6 train, though.  I'll be joined by two wonderful authors M. MacKinnon and Suanne Laqueur, who've both written actual serious books, so this is going to go over real well. The event is free so, if you live in NYC or are in town, you should come check out the carnage.  Also, in a few months, I'm going to see if the fools at BookCon and New York Comic-Con will let me set up booths at their respective fairs. Maybe I can CON my way into these Cons!   ...don't look at me like that. You signed up for this. Even if you didn't sign up for this, you still deserve it.

The Duckett & Dyer: Dicks For Hire Section

If you're new here, you might not know about my seminal non-award-winning independent sci-fi/mystery/comedy book Duckett & Dyer: Dicks For Hire. If you haven't, click the image below and check it out! The ebook is only $2.99, and is available for free on Kindle Unlimited. 

  If you'd prefer not to support Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos (I like to call him Jeff BOZOS!), then please traipse on down to your local bookstore and ask for it by name. Accept no substitutes.  I've also been informed that Duckett & Dyer is available at a few select libraries, which is kind of exciting because I love not paying for things. So if you want to stick it not only to Amazon, but the concept of capitalism as well, request it at your local library.

Additionally, in conjunction with my friend and occasional writing partner Andrew Cannizzaro, I was able to put together a book trailer for Duckett & Dyer, despite the fact that I think book trailers are bullshit. I don't know how it's going to convince you people to read the book, but that Dartfrog event said you HAD to have one, so here we are. Check it out below:

And finally, for those of you that HAVE read the book: first of all, thanks, I guess. Second of all, work on the sequel, Duckett & Dyer: The One-Hundred Percent Solution continues unabated, aside from the fact that I'm wasting time writing stupid newsletters. But, I'm still aiming for a 2020 release like a madman. Stay tuned to this space for future news and perhaps even some excerpts! But for now, enjoy this colorless, barebones graphic.

Other Projects

I've got nothing at the moment. I built an Ikea desk the other day. That's gotta count for something.  Oh, and I started this newsletter. You're welcome?

What the hell else do you want from me?

I'm always eager to hear comments, questions, and stupid ideas from my extremely beautiful and intelligent audience. If there's something you'd like me to do in a future edition* of this newsletter, let me know! I'd love to create some unique content based on your suggestions because it saves me mental energy from making stuff up on my own. You will receive no credit.  *Who am I kidding? This'll probably be the last one.

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